Thought For The Day #13

Broadcast 18th of November 2013 on BBC Radio Bristol

Loneliness has always been a big part of my life. Not necessarily because I haven’t had people around me, I think it’s my temperament as much as anything. In fact I can feel lonely when I’m with other people. Perhaps I don’t share their interests, or maybe there’s something burning inside me I don’t feel I can share. Equally, I find solitude can be a great companion. There’s comfort in not having the pressure to constantly present the sociable version of myself.

I’d say being in love is the most dramatic remedy for loneliness. It’s that magical feeling that not only does someone understand me but that they like me too! Another great antidote is shared experiences. Whether that’s having my story understood by someone else or hearing stories similar to my own. Like when I meet someone who grew up in the same town, or works in the same career. The conversation flows and we exchange knowing nods of recognition.

You see, I have this funny feeling, sort of somewhere behind my eyes, that I’m a person looking out on the world. Then when I find something in common with someone, for a moment it feels like we share the world in here, so to speak. Ironically one of those shared experiences is loneliness. Yes, it’s odd, but I can use my feelings of disconnection to feel connection. Though I wouldn’t go as far as to use it as an icebreaker at a party, “so you feel lonely then?” That’s just awkward. But I do take comfort and maybe others can too in the fact that we’re not alone in feeling alone.